Afaid of the Light

Not Silverstein, but Plato:

‘We can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark; the real tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light.’

I think that the tragedy comes because children are very aware of the fear of the dark...heck, I'm aware of my fear of the dark. Fear of the light is much different, and more dangerous, because we aren't always aware of it. We find ourselves digging our heals in, and out of discomfort shift our attention away from the light.
I can think of many times when I rejected the light out of fear. I remember denying the existence of dinosaurs, (BTW, I don't think that there are any real scholars that deny the existence of dinosaurs) because my theology didn't have room for dinosaurs.
I've been told a story of a Christian who rejected the miracle of someone being healed, because their "theology didn't allow it."

We are called to live in the light, let us be excited to emerge for the dark into the light. May our false presuppositions be revealed to be exactly that, and may we run into the marvelous light.

The Gospel by Sage:

I saw a movie at church today,
it was about Jesus.
He died on the cross because strangers killed him. 
But it was ok, because Jesus had to die for us.
But why did Jesus have to die for us?

----------------------------

Why did Jesus die for us? As a pastor you'd think that Sage would have found the perfect audience for this question, but what she didn't know was that her daddy had been struggling with the same question all morning.


It wasn't until college that anyone had really asked me that question in a way that 'for our sins' wouldn't suffice.
The question as to how Jesus' death on the cross provides atonement isn't a new one, but it is a question that the Church hasn't come to a consensus on.

N.T. Wright writes, "I am one of those who think it good that the church has never formally defined 'the atonement', partly because I firmly believe that when Jesus himself wanted to explain to his disciples what his forthcoming death was all about, he didn't give them a theory, he gave them a meal."

As my daughter begins now to ask me the same question that professors asked me 10 years ago, I find myself with even more questions, as the mystery of Jesus' mysterious death is more a mystery than ever.
Although I think that I have a theologically acceptable answer to Sage's question, I hope that she will be equipped to handle the mystery of the crucifixion, and be ok with having questions answered with more questions and stories.

Proud Papa

Aspen, (23 months) made me so proud yesterday. After watching Dora with her, she walked over to the TV, and said, "TV off." She then turned off the television, I told her to turn off the 'blue button' too, (which powers the receiver/speakers) and I smiled with contentment as she walked over and completed a task that most of her grandparents couldn't have pulled off.
I initially laughed at myself for getting so excited that my almost two-year old could power on and off our entertainment system, but then I got to be truly proud when after turning off the receiver she told Amber that she wanted to wear her "Jesus Shirt."

Is Christmas about compassion or consumerism?

Yesterday we went shopping. In our defense we started out shopping for children off of the Angel Tree at church, but as often is the case, included shopping for our own kids, as well as for ourselves. As we walked through aisles and aisles of plastic crap, the weight of Christmas consumerism was overwhelming.
This year we made the decision to match what we spend on our family with spending on others. That feels like a start, maybe start that will move from 50/50, to 30/70, and eventually 10/90.
Some relatives ask me what the girls need/want for Christmas, and my mind is blank. There is really nothing more that they need, but I can think of a lot other people who do have needs.

Today I read about the Advent Conspiracy, is an international movement restoring the scandal of Christmas by worshipping Jesus through compassion, not consumption. They point out that Christmas, at its core, is about changing the world, not about buying more and more things.

It's one thing to celebrate the festivities of this winter holiday, to go and look at lights, to cut down a tree, to decorate the house...but it's another thing to continue to worship this false god of consumerism. As we study Colossians at Community, and as I talk to students and hear from them how tight of a grip consumerism has over them, I worry about using this day recognized as the birth of our revolutionary Jesus, to fuel the fire of the adversary.

Now...back to Christmas shopping.

Update: Lisa asked me to elaborate as to what I mean by 50/50
For every dollar that we spend on someone that we know, we aim to spend a dollar on someone with needs who we don't know. Orphans, kids whose parents are in jail, children of migrant workers, etc. The idea is that however much money we spend on our own family/friends, we also spend on "the least of these."

I'm not sure whether or not to be proud of this...but I am.

I submitted my blog site to "The Blog Readability Test," and within seconds got this response:

This probably is a bad sign, it probably means that I need to use smaller-easier-to-understand-words... but somehow it feels pretty satisfying. ;-)

Count your blessings

Anytime that Jesus says: for this sums up the Law and the Prophets. It's probably wise to pay attention.
Here's the full pericope:

9"Which of you, if his son asks for bread, will give him a stone? 10Or if he asks for a fish, will give him a snake? 11If you, then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good gifts to those who ask him! 12So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets.

I'm familiar with this passage, and find solace in knowing that God is a good father, who gives good gifts. But I was reminded on Tuesday night at Rob Bells, The God's Aren't Angry tour how much God has given me, and how hesitant I am to trust him with the future. I realize that it is dumb not to trust God, but it is insane to not trust a God who has showered blessings upon me.

A friend from Matilija who also attended Westmont with me, always reminds me of the goals for my life that I shared with him in College. I wanted to

1) Live in Ojai
2) Have a manicured front lawn
3) Own a truck



Add to that the non materialistic goals that I've always had

a) Get married to a woman who loves Jesus
b) Have two daughters
c) Be a pastor

Alright, so maybe I was/am a bit shallow, but these were my stated goals as an 18 year old, (mixed in there somewhere was the whole goal to teach others about Jesus, but this post isn't about that).

So, I'm sitting listening to Rob Bell while I realize that although I am in fact generous and share with others, my initial reaction is to horde. What makes it really messed up is that out of my 6 stated goals, I now have all of them, and had very little to do with receiving any of them.



1) We can only live in Ojai because family has opened homes up to us.
2) I only have a manicured front lawn because my mom trades tutor services for lawn services.
3) I only have a truck because my Grandpa gave it to my family.
4) Amber married me because...(who really knows how I pulled off that one?)
5) I have two daughters because of something having to do with X & Y chromosomes and God.
6) I'm a pastor because God chose to call me and send me back to my home church.

So, my 18 year old goals have been achieved as gifts from God, none of them were achieved by my pulling myself up by my boot straps, and my initial response to another need seems to be hording. That sucks.

May I recognize that everything I have is a gift from God, and may I hold them with an open hand, trusting in Him.

Freebie

So, some of you have probably already heard about the new addition to the Smith House. When I was a sophmore in college, my roommates and I went in quarters on a new 25" TV from CostCo. After we were evicted 6 months later I bought my roommates shares of the tv and gave it to my mom. Then, when Amber and I got married we took the TV with us, and it was our first TV that we used for 6 years. Then, earlier this year, Amber's aunt gave us her CRT 35" monstrous TV. It was huge, but had no style...poor us ;-)
Then, last week, much to my excitement, Amber's sister let us know that they had replaced their rear projection HDTV with a plasma, and that we could have their old one.
So, Tim and I took a trip to LA and we picked it up. It had some bizzare blue lines going through some of the images, but after some internet research I took apart the front access panel, twisted a knob and "boom" the TV turned off. After I calmed myself down, I tried to turn it back on again, and there it was, a beautiful 50" image*, sans blue lines. It seems that it is only a temporary fix, and that sometime this year a tube may go ($500 to replace 1 of 3). So, I don't know how long we will get to enjoy watching Grey's Anatomy & Heros larger than life, but I'm enjoying it while it lasts.



Before and After










*Further research leads me to conclude that 50" is the perfect size for my living room, (Viewing distance /2 = ideal diagonal dimension)